Good Secretary?

Two weeks ago was my forty-fifth birthday, and I wasn't feeling too
hot that morning anyway. I went to breakfast knowing my wife would
be pleasant and say ?Happy Birthday,? and would probably have a
present for me. She didn't even say ?Good Morning,? let alone any ?
Happy Birthday.? I thought, ?Well, that's wives for you. Maybe the
children will remember.? The children came in to breakfast and
didn't say a word. When I started to the office I was feeling pretty
low and despondent. As I walked into my office, my secretary, Janet,
said, ?Good morning boss, Happy Birthday.? So I felt a little
better; someone had remembered. I worked until noon. Then Janet
knocked on my door and said, ?

You know, it's such a beautiful day outside and it's your birthday,
let's go to lunch, just you and me.? I said, ?By George, that's the
best thing I've heard all day. Let's go.? We went to lunch. We
didn't go where we normally go; we went out into the country to a
little private place. We had two martinis and enjoyed lunch
tremendously. On the way back to the office, she said, ?You know,
it's such a beautiful day. We don't need to go back to the office,
do we?? I said, ?No, I guess not.?

She said, ?Let's go to my apartment.? After arriving at her
apartment she said, ?Boss, if you don't mind, I think I'll go into
the bedroom and slip into something more comfortable.? ?Sure,? I
excitedly replied. She went into the bedroom and, in about six
minutes,


she came out carrying a big birthday cake, followed by my wife,
children and dozens of our friends. All were singing ?Happy
Birthday? and there on the couch I sat... naked.

And that is why I fired my secretary!